Monday, February 28, 2005

Everybody Stop!

I've been a bit disappointed with my blogging recently. I feel like it has dissolved into a series of badly written gig reviews, like the one I've just posted. I accept that I am my own worst critic, but I fear that if what I've read bores me, it's gonna bore everybody else. That presents a rather large question: just who am I blogging for?

I need to remind myself why it is that I started this in the first place. The point at the beginning was to explore some thoughts on community and see what developed. I've also wanted to blog about my responses to things, to develop my thinking about them and to try to understand my response. What I was trying to avoid was a blog that went along the lines of 'I did this and then I did that'. Reading through my previous entries does not fill me with much of a sense of satisfaction.

Now I question my current motivation. Do I now post because I fear that if I don't people will stop dropping by the blog? If that is the case two things are going to happen. Firstly I'm likely to stop posting because I won't enjoy it and secondly people will stop dropping by because what I am writing is rubbish. But then do I care if no one reads this? Probably. Does anybody read this?

There has to be room for light-heartedness and random crap as that reflects who I am. But there has got to be more to it than that.

Or does all this sound a bit angst-ridden and should I get over myself.

Stand by for another poetry review later on this week...

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

One of your family members drops by regularly to see what you have been doing. They appreciate everything you have to say and have been pretty impressed by the way you express yourself.

It is good to know what is going on in your life. You have a good eye for what is happening around you and a wicked ability to articulate it. Not surprised you enjoy this poetry slam thing.....

richard said...

Oooo! Now I'm curious. I thought for a bit that this is my father, but the use of the word 'wicked' seems to hint at a younger generation. But maybe my father is as hip as I've always hoped.

Thank you for the thoughts. No, I haven't stopped. I just need to take some more time with what I write. It's about writing in response to things and not writing because I feel obligated. It's those obligatory thoughts I'm trying to avoid because then I feel I write poorly.

Patrick said...

Hi Richard,

I understand exactly where you're coming from - I'm going through something similar with my blog. Venue and gig reviews, cultural calendars announcing events involving friends (who I'm happy to promote, btw). All stuff that I find interesting and will hopefully give visitors an idea of what, where and who to check out, but not all that satisfying from a writing perspective.

If I want to write more personal and experimental stuff I'll have to start another blog, which I hope to do in the near future. It's something that I've been thinking about for some time, and after reading this post, I reckoned such a blog is way overdue (btw, if you're interested, here's my first attempt at online journal-keeping and publishing).

Anyway, more than enough about me - thanks for the motivation (yes, I find this post motivating :'). FYI, I still check in regularly. I'm looking forward to your next entry...

Cheers,

Patrick

richard said...

Patrick,
a pleasure to know that you drop by. I think promoting your friends is a good thing to do via the blog. You should keep doing that. My friend Justice is performing at the next H&T slam, but I'm not sure if he wants me to promote this!

I feel stuck between a rock and a hard place when it comes to the writing. There's stuff I wanna say and then there's stuff I should say and then there's stuff I need to say and then there's stuff I shouldn't say and then finally there is stuff that people would like me to say. By giminy, there's a lot of stuff that could be said.

I believe a solution might be to carry on as I have been going but become more conscious of what I'm writing, and trying to be test my motivations for writing it. For stuff that goes beyond this, I might create a similar sort of thing to what you have created and divide that into two parts - creative writing and the sorts of things that I would prefer not to sit in the public domain.

It is also important to be aware of readers like my anonymous relative above who drop by. Sometimes what you create no longer becomes your own, that is it becomes important to other people. That is both flattering and humbling.

I like your creative writing site. The shit happens story is particularly amusing! Nice to know it's there. I reckon I'll drop by there avery now and again and have a read!

I'm going to be in Poland in late April with my little (big - he's not big, he's huge) brother and I'm hoping we'll make it across the border to Prague. If so, I'll drop you a line.

I trust your slam preparations are coming together nicely.

Cheers
Richard

richard said...

Meant to say in that last comment that it is nice to know that the archive is there, and that I'm planning to drop by the rest of it. I'm not planning to drop by just to read a poo story! although it is a funny story...